Does anyone know where I can find 'normal'? I seem to have misplaced it in the overwhelming whirlwind of life these past few weeks. Not that my family's version of 'normal' has ever been anything similar to the dictionary definition, but Wow!, when life comes at you, it really barrels in there doesn't it?
Many of you are aware of the circumstances of my life over the past month - the diagnosis of terminal cancer for my Dad and his subsequent death 19 days later - and I truly have no words deep enough to express my gratitude for all the love, encouragement and support you've shown me and my family during this most difficult of times.
You have mailed me cards - some from precious friends and some from new friends that I've never had the joy of meeting face to face. You have sent me e-cards that have helped boost my spirits, you have visited, brought food - lots of food and dessert!, you sent flowers and chocolate, you came to the visitation and Dad's Memorial Service. You've called me, texted me, e-mailed me and let me cry out to you in my heartache and let me share my stories and memories because you knew it would help me heal. Most of all you have prayed for me and for my family and you have stood in the gap for us, interceding on our behalf to the King of Kings who I know has held us close through these days.
I hope you know how very important what you did was for me, for us. If I could reach through this screen right now, I'd give each of you a big hug and tell you face to face how much you mean to me. Please know my heart and accept my sincerest gratitude for yours.
I suspect the days ahead to be different, challenging, interesting. It's still a struggle for me to be in the studio - I find it hard to be creative when my heart is hurting. But I'm trying. Trying to find a new normal. One where I carry my Dad in my heart and not walk with him holding my hand. I feel his presence daily. See him in my daughter, hear him in my head. I draw from his wisdom and remember the lessons his life taught me and pray that I will live a legacy worthy of the beauty of his life.
So, today I will go into the studio and pull out some paper, some ink, perhaps some glitter; and I will create. Not a masterpiece, not by any means, but a simple expression of the love in my heart for my Dad, my family, my friends (you). I am simply grateful and I thank God for you every day.
I do have a card to share with you today - it's one I created last year - yes, I've been holding out on you apparently. :) It's one that I created for my involvement in a special SU! event last July and thought it would be appropriate to share today.
It's "For You".
Wonderful, special, beautiful you!
Thank you friends and God bless you!