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Tuesday, May 3, 2011

Finding Normal

Does anyone know where I can find 'normal'? I seem to have misplaced it in the overwhelming whirlwind of life these past few weeks. Not that my family's version of 'normal' has ever been anything similar to the dictionary definition, but Wow!, when life comes at you, it really barrels in there doesn't it?

Many of you are aware of the circumstances of my life over the past month - the diagnosis of terminal cancer for my Dad and his subsequent death 19 days later - and I truly have no words deep enough to express my gratitude for all the love, encouragement and support you've shown me and my family during this most difficult of times.
You have mailed me cards - some from precious friends and some from new friends that I've never had the joy of meeting face to face. You have sent me e-cards that have helped boost my spirits, you have visited, brought food - lots of food and dessert!, you sent flowers and chocolate, you came to the visitation and Dad's Memorial Service. You've called me, texted me, e-mailed me and let me cry out to you in my heartache and let me share my stories and memories because you knew it would help me heal. Most of all you have prayed for me and for my family and you have stood in the gap for us, interceding on our behalf to the King of Kings who I know has held us close through these days.

I hope you know how very important what you did was for me, for us. If I could reach through this screen right now, I'd give each of you a big hug and tell you face to face how much you mean to me. Please know my heart and accept my sincerest gratitude for yours.

I suspect the days ahead to be different, challenging, interesting. It's still a struggle for me to be in the studio - I find it hard to be creative when my heart is hurting. But I'm trying. Trying to find a new normal. One where I carry my Dad in my heart and not walk with him holding my hand. I feel his presence daily. See him in my daughter, hear him in my head. I draw from his wisdom and remember the lessons his life taught me and pray that I will live a legacy worthy of the beauty of his life.

So, today I will go into the studio and pull out some paper, some ink, perhaps some glitter; and I will create. Not a masterpiece, not by any means, but a simple expression of the love in my heart for my Dad, my family, my friends (you). I am simply grateful and I thank God for you every day.

I do have a card to share with you today - it's one I created last year - yes, I've been holding out on you apparently. :) It's one that I created for my involvement in a special SU! event last July and thought it would be appropriate to share today.
It's "For You".
Wonderful, special, beautiful you!


Thank you friends and God bless you!
~~Robin

8 comments:

  1. Robin, your post touched my heart. I am sitting here at work with tears in my eyes. I wish I could hop on a plane to give you a hug in person, give you a shoulder to cry on and be the person to nudge you back in your stamp room to create something beautiful. Like I said the other night, it takes time....moment by moment...day by day. Until then, your faith, family and friends will help you through this troubling time. Love ya!

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  2. What a fun, bright and cheery card Robin! Put it on your desk in a prominent place and look at it often so it can brighten your spirits when you're feeling down. Take care.

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  3. You've been in my prayers since your dad's diagnosis and then heartbreakingly fast passing. I will continue to pray that a new normal finds you and that you find comfort in family, friend and of course stamping.

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  4. hi Robin, I rarely post a comment but want you to know even strangers pray for you. I am sorry for your sadness and pray that you will feel more "normal" in the months ahead. Take it easy and slowly. Your heart needs this time to heal.

    Sincerely
    Donna Centamore (ButternutsageDesigns)

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  5. Robin I'm so sorry you are having to go through such a terrible thing. My heartfelt sympathies go out to you and your family. May you continue to rely on God's strength to carry you. I've always admired your work and have many saved in my favorites. When the time is right - you will be able to create again...not with a heavy heart but with one knowing your Dad is always with you and watching over you. You have a very special guardian angel now that will follow you throughout your life. God Bless you and your family - you are all in my thought and prayers.

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  6. Well, you sure know how to make your cyber friends feel loved and appreciated!

    Your card for all of us is beautiful.

    Know that you are thought of and loved every single day.

    (((HUGS)))

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  7. Robin, I just learned today about yur father's passing. My life has been a bit full lately also with the recent death of a family member. I just wanted to tell you that I lost my dad 26 years ago and cried for nearly a year before I could let everything go and just remember he is now well and probably fishing up there with our family members and being watched over by our savior. He told me that a fathers love for his daughter is a very special love and I believe that. A father will stick up for his daughter and always be proud of you and your accomplishments. Remember the times and relish all the good memories. Prayer going out today for you and your family. Thanks for creating all the beautiful cards for us to enjoy on your blog.
    Stella Boatman

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  8. Robin, like so many others, I am reading this post with a tear in my eye....ok, maybe more than one? But I wanted to know that I have been praying for you, I am so sorry for your loss and hope things are settling down for you. One of my favorite speakers is Patsy Clarmont (she is amazing and travels with the Women of Faith group) but wrote a book entitled, "Normal Is Just A Setting On The Dryer". I love this expression because it pretty well covers it all! So take it easy on yourself as you find your way in this "new normal".

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